smartignani

Calm is from within.

As I go about my days and attempt to fall into a rhythm and a routine- I am assured that nothing is ever consistent and that chaos is the new normal.

With three very active children under 5 years of age, I am slowly becoming accustomed to the crazy schedule, lack of sleep and horrific, loud, contiguous noise. Their boisterous laughter mixed with their screams and whines have amalgamated into one sweet hum of never ending “childish” sounds that make me smile and feel humbled that I was granted this gift. Not one but three beautiful children who make me lose my mind and grateful that I exist- at the same time. They have given my life meaning and mean everything to my life.

I have to keep reminding myself that life moves quickly and children grow up far too fast. I can’t slow down the moments that pass but I can try to enjoy them- relish them-cherish them and savour them.

In my ubiquitous  desire to do more, be more and have more- I often realize that there is far too much happening simultaneously. I am currently in the midst of establishing a brand new business, studying to obtain a Master’s Degree, working full-time at the Government and busy mothering the three gifts that God gave me.

Sometimes I ask myself “Why do you do this to yourself?” and myself always responds with “Life is short- make the most of it”.

So tonight I decided to take a moment and just be.

I listen to the baby babbling before he goes to sleep. The sisters whispering and giggling over their private jokes. The wind howling outside my house. I listen.

I am still and and I am present.

It is too easy to be overwhelmed and afraid. It is simple to evade and escape. It is natural to withdraw and become anxious. But tonight- I choose to be still.

I am proud of everything I achieved so far. I know that there is still so much for me to do. I am aware that my goal is to change the world and make an impact on those who know me. But for tonight…I am still.

In mentoring others, I have always replied to their common query “How do you do all that?” – I would say “One moment at a time”.

So here it is. My moment. This moment I choose silence. I choose stillness. I choose prayer.

In the hustle and bustle, I choose peace.

I am blessed.

Grateful.

Whole.

I am ready to face what’s in front of me.

Until next time,

SMartignani